Most upvoted comment
10 most mentioned books on TwoChromosomes that will make you more knowledgable. rank no. 22
My bf (24) told me to “get over” my (f22) childhood abuse last night. I don’t know how to deal with this…(r/relationships)
You sound like me. I grew up similarly abused and also have anxiety and self esteem issues.
He’s being insensitive for sure (maybe a bit ignorant), especially after you told him that you were ready to see a therapist (great idea because that’s what I did and I’m a lot better now). I don’t even know why he said that when you said you were going to see a therapist, it kind of makes me mad that he did when you were actively trying to fix yourself. My boyfriend was happy that I saw one and supported me.
But he might not be aware that people with anxiety issues do not simply just get over it, it’s a long process of acceptance. A lot of people think that way about anxiety so I don’t really think you should blame him for that.
So you should definitely communicate to him that this is a part of you that you are trying to fix and as a boyfriend he should be supportive in your decision, and that you are hurt by him telling you to get over it. Though he hasn’t talked to you, just be the bigger person and explain yourself, because he may not fully understand.
BTW you are not WORTHLESS. You deserve to feel good about yourself, I used to think exactly like you, and it’s just circular thinking. Therapy is the way to go. Fantastic book if you would like to get started on your way to loving yourself: Anxiety and Phobia Workbook. If you need anyone to talk to you can PM me. I want to help because I know how it felt and still feels.