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Dad here :: How do I help my 10yo daughter deal with mean girls?(r/TwoXChromosomes)
What a lucky girl your daughter is, you’re doing so great just by validating her feelings and perspective about all this. As an adult it can seem like small issues, but as a kid these are the Big Things that stick with her and really affect her. You obviously really love her.
I think you should stay out of it except for counseling your daughter, unless it becomes a safety issue. Talk with her as much as she wants to, and tell her you will intervene if she asks you to. Otherwise let her handle it in terms of actually talking with the other kids/teachers. That will give her safe ownership of the problem, because she knows you’ll step in if she asks.
I heard someone explain this to their daughter in a relatable way that might work for you. Often in classrooms teachers have something like a marble jar, when the class earns one through good behavior or whatever they add a marble and negative things they remove one; a full jar earns some big treat for the class. Friendships are like a marble jar, positive experiences fill it up and negative experiences empty it. Does this girl fill…