As contemporary poets sing the glories of birds, birch trees, and menstruation, regular guys are left scratching their heads. Who can speak for Everyman? Who will articulate his love for Xbox 360, for Mama Celeste’s frozen pizza, for the cinematic oeuvre of Bruce Willis?  Enter Broetry–a stunning debut from a dazzling new literary voice. “Broet Laureate” Brian McGackin goes where no poet has gone before–to Star Wars conventions, to frat parties, to video game tournaments, and beyond. With p…

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Whats the silliest fight you’ve ever been in?(r/AskReddit)

Yes, I Cheated On You

Is that what you wanted to hear?
Because deep down you know that
it’s true, right? Clearly I’m unfaithful.

No, I didn’t cheat on you, dipshit,
but I will if you keep it up. Stop
looking for signs that aren’t

there—sexts and e-mails, late night
phone calls—excuses to be unhappy.
If I wanted to fuck somebody else

I’d dump your ass. Where do you
suppose I would find the time to
cheat on you? The fourteen hours

a week we do not spend together
perhaps? Or maybe when you’re
in the bathroom? Yeah, that has

to be it: I can’t wait for you to
go to the bathroom so I can sneak
off and fuck my other girlfriend.

If only you had a smaller bladder,
I could cheat on you more often.

from Broetry by Brian McGackin

*edited to give BM some more love. Buy his book!

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Brian McGackin

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Quirk Books

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Whats the silliest fight you’ve ever been in?

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