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Am I being unreasonable?(r/survivinginfidelity)
You need to step back a bit and take a large deep breath. This rabbit hole goes deeper than you know. I want you to understand that nothing you did, nothing in your relationship, nothing at that has to do with you caused this cheating. This is 100% on him. There are many healthy choices that a person can make when they think that a relationship needs work, none of those includes sex with other people. The reasons for his cheating lie in his mind.
You will need to prepare yourself that there is probably more times they have met up and had sex. They were engaged in an EA and sexting which fuels the dopamine centers in the brain. It was also illicit so the secrecy also added mystery and the allure of the naughtiness of it all also built up the sexual tensions. If he took trips back to his hometown after the EA started, then I can almost bet they met up then. One of the tools that cheaters/waywards use is minimization, they will only admit to what you have found out on your own. They may also pad the numbers a bit adding maybe…