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When I was 14, a girl made up that I was pregnant, and I was locked at home after school until I was 16. Now pregnant and married but feel some shame?(r/TwoXChromosomes)
They don’t get to decide what your feelings should be. They don’t. That’s not how this works. What they did to you as a teen was abusive and caused trauma for you that has had lasting effects. That’s real. Just because they’ve suppressed all their own feelings and issues and are probably pretty miserable people doesn’t mean they can expect the same from you.
You didn’t deserve any of what happened to you and you don’t deserve this now. None of it was or is your fault. You said in your OP that you weren’t “a perfect teenager” and that you fought with your mom about other stuff too, but a) there is no such thing as a perfect teenager, b) it’s typical for teens to argue with their parents, c) of course you fought with your mom over other things if she was the kind of parent who would treat a child the way she treated you over the pregnancy allegation, and d) no one ever deserves to be abused, for any reason, no matter what.
Your were a vulnerable child who already had a hard time at school, who had worked hard to earn a scholarship, and when…